Tanya is an Eastern European lady who works in the tourism and hospitality industry. Her husband has interviewed her in order to contribute to this blog post.
Her reliability in her own words:
The 80/20 rule indicates that 80% of my results are actually caused by 20% of my tasks and activities at work (Kruse 2016). Therefore, I have to identify which tasks and activities lead to my big wins / major achievements. Here is what I have done:
Step 1: On the left-hand side of a sheet of paper, I wrote down all tasks and activities that I do at work, e.g., serving customers, helping with the work in the kitchen, running online marketing projects, updating the menu and creating strategic marketing plans.
Step 2: On the right-hand side of this sheet of paper, I wrote down all of the big wins / major achievements that I have had during my placement, i.e., increasing the business revenue by 31% and improving customers’ feedback / satisfaction.
Step 3: I drew a line to link every task on the left with every major achievement on the right.
In this way, I can easily and quickly see which tasks resulted in my major achievements: creating strategic marketing plans and running online marketing projects absolutely moved the needle forward. Apparently, these two activities are the 20% of my action that I have to focus on in the future because these two tasks are my real strengths that can bring tremendous results in the long term.
As long as I stick to the 80/20 rule, I will be able to minimize my to-do list when I become a manager in the tourism and hospitality industry in the future – I can eliminate unnecessary tasks that do not bring any value, streamline necessary tasks that can add value, double down on my strengths that literally move the needle forward and delegate activities that I am not good at. This system will certainly help me to reduce the stress level at work and manage my time as well as energy more effectively (Ferriss 2007).
Obviously, Tanya is a reliable and hardworking Eastern European woman.
How to make her admire you:
As a man in dating and relationships, you’ll either lead or be misled. Now the question is: How do you be a leader in dating and relationships? The answer is simple (but this doesn’t mean it’s easy): You have to keep your frame.
Do you know why women dress up? The reason is quite obvious – women are validated by attention. Ironically, when you actually pay (show) attention to women because of their beauty, that’s exactly when they lose interest in you. I know this sounds strange, but please let me explain.
Women want to impress men (women are biologically programmed to do that) – they just don’t know it (or don’t want to admit it). More specifically, women want to impress men that they admire. Meanwhile, women are not impressed by men who give them validation simply because they look attractive. Here is why –
If you pay attention to her beauty instantly, that implies two things: 1) You don’t have abundance in your love life. In other words, the perceived value is absent. 2) She is the most attractive woman in your reality. In other words, the perceived challenge is absent. Remember: without perceived value and perceived challenge, attraction is non-existent. The end.
Just be unfazeable.
No, that’s not a spelling mistake. In fact, that is the cornerstone of maintaining masculine energy. (Sadly, unfazeable stillness is not common in men.)
- When she violates your standards or crosses your boundaries, you need to call her out without showing anger. That is to say, you would be well-advised to tell her what she has done is a big turn-off in a calm manner – tell her that clearly with conviction (and without emotions). Then give her a few days to process what you’ve told her.
- If she is angry for some reason, you should not join her anger. Always manage her emotions calmly before offering a solution.
I can give you 1,001 tactics regarding how to walk, how to talk and how to carry yourself – those are important, but to be honest, those tactics can only increase your perceived value (which is absolutely necessary). Yet at the end of the day, perceived value is like the trailer of a movie, whereas your real value is the actual movie. Many men look great. They have external confidence because they work on their grooming, learn communication skills, etc. These definitely play a key role in dating and relationships. However, external confidence is just like the trailer of a movie. If that’s all you’ve got, then when a woman starts a relationship with you, she will realize that the actual movie itself is very boring.
“You have to build your real value by improving your health, wealth, personality and mindset.”