In western countries, most relationships are quite stressful. In our society, what stops us from having real conversations which give us the truth? You need to be brave and authentic so that you can have awkward but important conversations with your partner. Be courageous and vulnerable. Empower yourself to have an authentic conversation without worrying too much about if the conversation will push your partner away or offend your partner. If you can determine who the conversation is for, you will be able to process the answer without feeling totally rejected as a no isn’t necessarily a rejection. It turns out that Eastern European ladies are very different from western women, for they tend to think that authentic relationships are the exact opposite of codependent relationships.
- Romantic relationships deepen when awkward but important conversations happen earlier.
Indeed, the ability for two individuals to navigate differences in beliefs, approaches or perspectives honestly and openly is the single most important factor in whether this relationship will be a difficult or thriving relationship.
As I see it, being able to ask awkward but important questions is probably the most attractive trait to create authenticity and safety in a relationship. Looking at whether your partner leans into or moves away from you as you ask her uncomfortable questions will tell you so much about the unity.
The key to authentic vulnerability is to share how it makes you feel without suggesting that your partner has done something wrong. A common mistake – people oftentimes focus on who’s the issue rather than what’s the issue.
Men and women can be relationship ready without being an outstanding communicator so long as they care about this trait as they truly understand that everyone’s needs are different in terms of emotional connection, communication as well as the ultimate freedom to be an individual.
Uncomfortable but important conversations give you an opportunity to understand what type of connection you actually have. The No. 1 indicator is how your partner respond and whether you feel safer, better and closer to your partner or not. Then you need to listen, understand, acknowledge and meet or support her needs. Usually, people mistake permission with real support, but saying yes doesn’t always mean you actually support them. True support is when you completely understand her request and proactively make it become a reality. If you can’t do that, it’s fine as well. The same difficult but meaningful conversation should be had in return so both individuals’ needs can be heard and actually respected.
- Communication skills at the beginning of a relationship:
We have all heard of ‘red flags’ in relationships. But how about green flags?
Green Flag A: When you share your insecurities, this woman understands you and supports you.
Red Flag A: When you share your insecurities, this woman uses your insecurities against you to benefit herself.
Let’s say you are worried about your height and/or your age. A green flag is a woman supports you fully as she wants to make you very happy, whereas a red flag is she uses your insecurities to manipulate you, e.g., whenever you indicate that you are emotionally independent or you don’t mind being alone, she would remind you of your height and/or age immediately.
Green Flag B: She treats the waitress/waiter well in a café or restaurant.
Red Flag B: She treats the waitress/waiter in an indifferent or rude manner.
When you go out with her and sit in a café or restaurant, she treats you with respect because this is the beginning of a relationship & she is on her best behavior at this stage.
Please observe how she treats the waitress/waiter in the café or restaurant. Does she show gratitude and appreciation? Does she display sufficient respect?
When things go wrong in the café or restaurant (e.g., the drink/food isn’t right), how does she treat the waitress/waiter now?
If she treats the waitress/waiter without respect, that’s surely her real behavior in reality. By contrast, if she shows real respect all the time, it means she is a high-value woman.
Green Flag C: She is honest, even if the truth is awkward.
Red Flag C: She lies to you.
Eastern European women highly value honesty because they believe that honesty is the best policy. Honesty represents authenticity in a relationship.
However, if a woman lies to you (especially when she lies about small things at the early stage of a relationship), it means lying is probably her habit. This is definitely a red flag as small lies usually lead to much big lies later on.
“Please look for green flags when you are looking for the right woman.”