We’ve all done this: falling madly in love with someone and love is blind. Today I’d like to show you how to tell if you’ve found the one so that you’ll be well-informed and make the right decisions for yourself.

  • Discover this person’s value system.

Ask questions that reveal your partner’s values. When you are going out on a date, don’t ask boring questions such as “which accounting firm do you work for?” (You’ll know that later if you two go out regularly in the future.) Instead, ask questions like “why do you want to be an accountant?” Remember, why questions are way more powerful because these questions reveal a person’s values and who they really are. Therefore, if the answer is “I want to be an accountant because I love helping people with their finance management.” That reveals the following values: 1) This person values wealth; 2) This person values connection with people. Therefore, if you share the same values with this person, you know probably you’ve found the one.

  • Try sharing life together.

Live with your new partner before starting a long-term relationship. If you’ve decided that your new partner is attractive, you should move them in quickly, so that you will see whether you can live with this person in the long term or not. For instance, you should spend a whole weekend with this person and evaluate how compatible you two are. If you feel happy with your shared life experience under the same roof now, you know he/she is probably the one. If you can’t even stand them, you should exit the relationship right now.

safe in relationships

  • Have you joined this person’s social circle?

Meet his/her friends early. One effective way to know your new partner really well is to observe his/her friends early on. We all know that friends are family that we choose, so your new partner’s friends’ qualities can easily show you what you can expect from your new partner. For example, if you see that most of his/her friends are intelligent and well-educated, you’ll know your new partner can’t be dumb. If that’s very important to you, then you know this person is very likely to be the one.

  • If you haven’t found the one yet….

If you aren’t dating the one… yet, don’t worry. Let me show you how to be happily single!

First of all, please do not ignore your emotions. Simply visualize your emotions and cuddle each of them. Give yourself permission to cry when you want to.

Second, do not escape from your reality. Deal with what’s right in front of you. One step at a time!

Next, consider taking up a new hobby. It’s time to build an exciting life that you are truly proud of.

Lastly, being alone is actually an opportunity to work on yourself. Now you have enough time to focus on your career, personal development, self-care, etc.

By the way, here are the signs you are not ready for a romantic relationship:

  1. You do not make time for dating. Yes, dating takes time. It’s just like other activities in your life – working in front of a computer takes time; cooking takes time; watching TV with your family takes time. You have to make time for dating. Otherwise, you are simply not ready for a relationship yet.
  2. You haven’t got over your ex yet. If you are still thinking about your ex / wanting to get your ex back / looking at your ex’s social media, you are not over your ex yet. Have you thought of seeing a therapist?
  3. You simply do not want a romantic relationship. This is legitimate. It’s perfectly okay. A lot of people find fulfillment and reward in aloneness, creativity, friends, and work. These are all fine.

But when you are ready for a relationship, you should keep reading blog posts on our website because we keep publishing new articles regularly. Watch this space!

“You have to stay safe in relationships because your wellbeing is more important than a relationship.”