Oftentimes, flirting is something that most singles assume that they are already good at without wondering whether they can improve this skill. In actuality, a lot of singles just can’t get it right – they think they are good at flirting without realizing that they are actually aggressive, too needy, too bland, or making mistakes. Remember: flirting isn’t just something you do on the first date; it’s certainly beyond that. I would argue that flirting is what you need to keep doing in a long-term relationship because that’s what keeps the spark alive.
The two important elements of flirting: challenge and interest.
Challenge means making a Russian woman feel some kind of excitement so that she wants to pursue you – that’s how you turn the tables!
Interest means letting the Russian lady know that you like her, thereby encouraging her to invest in you!
Basically, a woman needs to feel that she has to meet certain standards in order to date you. She hasn’t really won you yet and she wants to win you. Therefore, you would be well-advised to show your high standards, have your opinions as well as stand by your own values.
Also, she needs to know that you genuinely like her. You can achieve this effect through eye contact and words. This will make her feel connected to you psychologically.
First date ideas that revolutionize the way you flirt:
Instead of the traditional dinner-and-movie date, I’d like to encourage you to try something different when you go out with a Russian lady next time.
Firstly, take her to eat ice cream! Compared to a coffee date, ice cream is so much more interesting. Also, you can just walk along while eating ice cream if it’s a sunny day or sit in the park. This helps you relax and wouldn’t make you nervous. 😉
Secondly, you may walk along a beauty spot for a change. Take the scenic route and be creative. This will inspire good conversations and allow you to explore new areas of the city. Of course, this first date idea will work better if you actually have a destination instead of aimlessly walking around in town.
Thirdly, take her to do something competitive with you. It can be shooting pool or bowling. These are all very romantic date ideas. If you are introverted, doing something competitive together will give you the opportunity to talk less on the first date so that you can have more to talk about on the second date! 😊
Next, get the Russian woman to make something with you. This can be making sandcastles, building a snowman or cooking! As long as you both become creative and work on a project together, it will be a fun date. This is an opportunity which allows you to bond over something cool and constructive. You may even show off your skills! What’s more, after working together, you two will feel psychologically closer to each other.
In addition, visit your own city like a tourist. Take the Russian lady to a historic site, an art gallery, a local museum or a poetry reading. Be curious. Be adventurous. Don’t make this first date too long – one hour should be enough.
Furthermore, go to a concert together. Well, it doesn’t have to be a big concert. In fact, I think going to a bar to watch live music is probably better because it’s low-key and relaxing. If the music becomes boring, you two can leave the venue at any time! No pressure on you!
Last but not least, go to a cocktail bar that is intriguing and offbeat. I know this date idea is also quite traditional, but it gives you a window to evaluate whether the conversation is great or not. You need to see if you like this woman or not before asking her out again, right?
How to be an amazing conversationalist on a first date:
In the first place, you should ask high-quality questions. Better questions will make you more interesting. Frankly, people like talking about themselves, so the more you allow them to do that, the more they will want to talk to you.
Let’s say you are in a gallery with a Russian girlfriend. You can say this to her, “What type of art would you fill your living room with?”
Besides, people enjoy talking about how they got to where they are right now and where they would like to go. Thus, you should dig into their past & future by asking, “What made you want to move to this country?” & “When did you figure out that you like being a nurse?”
In the second place, a good conversationalist is usually an avid reader. Truthfully, wonderful conversations are actually two great minds interacting. That’s why it’s paramount to keep your brain fed with good information to share.
As I see it, the best way to achieve that effect is to read more books and learn more. Well, you don’t really have to read physical books if you don’t have time for that. You can listen to an audio book or a podcast when you are driving or working out in the gym. You can read blog posts and articles in magazines. This can be anything that gives you inspiration and ideas to add on a topic.
For instance, you may weave fascinating thoughts into conversations: “I just discovered the best theory about human dynamics yesterday.” / “I read this blog article about the mindset of successful entrepreneurs.”
Lastly, show some vulnerability so that you can have a genuine connection. No, I’m not talking about sharing your worst experiences and sadness with your girlfriend from Russia on a date. I mean checking your ego at the door, being happy to drop your guard & be real and sharing a story which makes you look realistic rather than perfect. Be authentic. Give her comfort. Be okay with your imperfection. Remember: Russian women do not want to interact with a mask that you wear in public. They want to connect to the real you!
Why you shouldn’t keep texting her for hours:
You are supposed to properly catch up with your girlfriend from Russia rather than texting her for hours on the phone.
Worse still, chatting with someone via text messages often leads to misunderstanding and conflict. According to Glamour, if disagreement happens over 20% of the time, the relationship is actually in danger.
In other words, a great relationship should make you feel really good 80% of the time and only 20% of the time you feel average. It’s okay to feel irritated occasionally as this is the real world. But when conflicts rise beyond the 20% threshold, you will begin to feel drained, suffocated and stifled.
“It is your job to keep her interested in you by creating chemistry and building attraction through flirting with her in the right ways.”