Nobody wants to be hurt in dating and relationships, so I’d like to give some advice on dating safely today & you will benefit from the information in this article.
Misconception 1: “We have been dating for two months, so this must be real.”
Truthfully, the feeling of hopelessness after someone suddenly disappears on you is about the potential of where the relationship was going as well as the connection you thought you had. Many daters take their partners’ attention, affection and communication to mean that this must be serious. Remember: time alone doesn’t bond two individuals. You have been dating every single day for two months, yet if that person has not dropped their guard or taken extra steps to actually get to know you past the point of just hanging out, it’s only as serious as Week 1. Note that when a person feels serious about you, they will want to get serious and lock you down. It doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with timeframe. If that person doesn’t have a sense of urgency, then they are thinking hanging out with you is a good time, nothing more. Always look at how you are treated by someone, not just how long that person has been around you. That person’s behavior is much more important than how long they have been around you. This is the most important advice on dating safely.
Misconception 2: “I’ve met my partner’s parents, so this must be serious.”
This is another very common misconception in dating and relationships. Unfortunately, nowadays meeting the parents is not as big a deal as it used to be. You should be properly introduced to the family in today’s day and age.
I know many daters who have met their partner’s parents, siblings, grandparents, uncles and aunts (they have even gone out for a picnic or a barbecue together), but they are still in relationship purgatory. They were saying, “I have met my partner’s family, including all the cousins. That means this is a serious relationship, right?” In reality, these days people don’t really think that far ahead. Sadly, in this day and age, taking someone that you’re dating around family is only convenience, nothing more. This isn’t the proof that indicates a serious relationship. If you haven’t been in the dating scene for years, this can be the most useful advice on dating safely for you today.
Therefore, don’t let meeting your partner’s parents and even becoming close to the family get you excited. Even if you talk to the family on the phone regularly, you are still not in the family. Until your partner actually wants to be serious and shows you this fact, don’t get too excited.
Misconception 3: “My partner is always with friends, so I’m not good enough.”
People enjoy different activities. For example, men may want to watch a football game, whereas women might want to go shopping. No matter how much you have in common and how much you love being around that individual, there will be times when your partner has to be “the other version” of themselves. This is just like at your job you are professional, but when you are hanging out with your friends and family on a Saturday night, you are very playful.
This is my sincere advice on dating safely: When your partner is hanging out with friends instead of you, your partner is probably looking for balance only. This isn’t about you at all.
Having said that, if your partner is spending more than 4 nights per week with friends rather than with you, there is possibly an issue in your relationship, e.g. maybe your partner sees friends as more interesting or entertaining than you are. Nevertheless, if your partner spends 3 nights with friends and 4 nights with you each week, that’s not a problem. You need to get over your jealousy. Remember: the more you try to control your partner, the more your partner wants to rebel against you.
Misconception 4: “My partner doesn’t want to go out socially with me – that means I’m not good-looking enough.”
If your partner only wants to stay at home with you and watching TV together is your standard date night, that’s because you allow it. If you are insecure about your looks, staying at home only adds fuel to the fire. If you are worried that others think you are not good-looking enough, that probably means you think you are not good-looking enough. Sorry for the uncomfortable advice on dating safely.
Another piece of advice on dating safely: If you know you are attractive, all you need to do is to demand your partner to go out with you. Tell your partner what you want to do because no one can read your mind.
There are people who lock their partners away ashamed simply because their partner is ugly; there are also people who lock their partners away only because their partner is too good-looking. At the end of the day, shame and jealousy may have the same outcome – your partner wants to keep you away from other people. In fact, most people fall in the middle, meaning your partner is probably just lazy and doesn’t want to do anything that requires more energy. Once your partner is in a relationship, they don’t want to invest in going out for date nights anymore because staying at home is just easier. That’s my honest advice on dating safely.
With Uber Eats, why go out when everyone can order in? With Netflix, why go to the cinema when everyone can sit on the couch? In this case, if you expect to go out for date nights, it’s your responsibility to tell your partner what you actually expect.
That being said, if you have self-esteem issues about your appearance, you must deal with them first. Never project it on your partner who is only being lazy.
Misconception 5: “My partner keeps in contact with their ex, so they are sleeping together.”
Everybody’s ex situation is unique and different. Remember: Your partner broke up with their ex for a reason. Not everyone wants to hurt others’ feelings intentionally or burn bridges, so maybe your partner doesn’t delete their ex’s phone number. Having said that, your partner should stop calling their ex if all their needs are being met by you.
So long as your relationship is solid, your partner’s ex shouldn’t be an outside threat. In my opinion, your partner and their ex aren’t sleeping together simply because your partner keeps the ex’s phone number, but if your partner still calls their ex regularly, that usually means your partner is keeping the door open just in case the relationship with you doesn’t work out. I’m sorry if this is some brutal honesty, but this article is about advice on dating safely – you need to know the truth in order to protect yourself.
“What this blog is saying isn’t necessarily something that you want to hear, but it’s the truth.”