Looking for dating safety advice? This article will show you exactly how to protect your personal finances in the dating department.
Dating safety advice: You need to have a dating budget.
Maybe you’ve never heard this term “dating budget” before, but it’s a very useful concept & here’s how it works:
If you are a man, you probably must have a dating budget because when you ask a woman out for a dinner date, chances are you’ll need to pay for the dinner. Even if the lady offers to pay, you are supposed to pay anyway. If you let the lady pay 50% of the bill, I doubt whether she will want to see you again (this is especially true if the lady isn’t a western woman). In other words, western women are more likely to go Dutch with their men, but you are probably aware of the high divorce rate in western countries, meaning when women are 100% financially independent, they are much more likely to divorce their husbands, so it’s actually a trade-off. Sad but true.
A traditional woman expects her man to look after her financially, and she looks after her man in other ways. She makes sure the household is great and kids are taken care of. She wants to look good for her husband, thereby making her husband look good.
Anna Bey famously said, “Nowadays women are supporting men financially, but men are not supporting women biologically, so feminism is actually against women.” This is so true.
Having said that, if you think your wife should pay 50% of all bills, that’s okay. There is nothing wrong with that. I’m not here to judge you.
Anyway, let’s say your dating budget is $1,000 per month. Then you shouldn’t allow your expenditure to go beyond that point. This is the most important dating safety advice which helps you be in control. Clarity and certainty are so key.
If you are a woman, you also need to have a dating budget, but this concept works differently for women. Please let me explain.
You don’t need to pay for things when you are dating a guy. But you probably have to pay for items such as new clothes, shoes and makeup if you plan to look great when you are going out with him. That’s very normal and totally understandable.
That being said, your clothes don’t have to be expensive, but they have to be right. So, you can go to H&M or eBay.
Dating safety advice that actually works: Let’s say your dating budget is $500 per month, then make sure you don’t spend more than $500 per month on new clothes, shoes and makeup. By the way, you don’t need to buy any jewelry because your boyfriend is supposed to buy jewelry for you – jewelry is a gift for love.
Money system for singles and couples:
No matter you are single and looking for love or you have found someone special already, this dating safety advice is for you.
Financially successful people usually have more than one bank account because clarity helps them become rich:
- Your daily transaction account is your cash pool (this is where your income comes in).
- Pay yourself first: save 10% to a savings account (Gradually, you can increase the amount you save. But 10% is a good amount to start.)
- Your play account: save 10% to this account — this is the money that you can spend (e.g. going out for dinner, going shopping for clothes, having a spa/massage, etc.) — You won’t feel guilty because you have planned this well & if you don’t treat yourself, you’ll feel resentful.
- Your housing account: use this money to pay your rent/mortgage (if you don’t have rent or mortgage to pay, you don’t need this account).
- Your other account: different people have different needs, so this account can be your education account (e.g. personal development, books, etc.) or your tithing account (e.g. donating money to charity).
- Your tax account (if you are self-employed, you need this account): Don’t ignore this part. Otherwise, you’ll be surprised when you receive a tax bill.
- Your utility bills account: use this money to pay your electricity, water, gas and mobile phone bills.
Therefore, it can be seen that financially successful people pay themselves first and they pay their bills last.
Dating safety advice: When you are spending beyond your means, you are probably buying things that are not in true alignment with your values.
When it comes to dating safety advice, I’d like to point out that the deeper you are willing to go in your honesty and transparency about your financial decisions and your values, the higher you can fly and the sweeter your love life will be.
You probably don’t want to have it all; you just need to have what you want.
No one actually wants it all. People really only want what they want. True happiness comes from wanting what we have rather than having what we want. Therefore, practicing appreciating what you already have is the fast-track to fulfillment. That means when you are dating someone special, you can focus on enjoying the little things together, e.g. quality time at home, going to the movies, sharing some hobbies, etc. You don’t have to spend a lot of money in order to feel satisfied in your love life.
If your partner insists on spending too much money, you may need to rethink this relationship – does your partner love you or your money? That’s the ultimate dating safety advice.
Truthfully, getting yourself into alignment with what truly turns you on lights up the entire world. Now it’s time to sit down with your partner and define your riches. For example, here is a list of definitions that many daters have shared over the years:
- Ease. Letting the worry slip away replaced by dreams and hopes.
- Wealth is being able to say, “I have everything I need” and mean it. It’s about being able to do what you want, when you want, with whom you love. It’s about the freedom to discover who you really are and to act in service.
- Wealth means appreciating, wanting and savoring what you have in terms of love, work, adventure, and so on.
- Wealth means to be able to choose the best alternative without having to let the price tag speak.
- Wealth means inner peace, freedom, happiness, hugs and health.
- Wealth means inner fulfillment that frees me to give to others unconditionally.
- Wealth means having the creativity and freedom to do whatever my heart desires.
- Wealth means having inner peace at all times.
- Wealth is the support and love of family and friends, which makes for the riches in my life.
- Wealth means having a community or tribe that never fails to rock my world every single day.
- Wealth means enjoying life with my partner every day.
“When you and your partner get clear on your definition of wealth, you don’t need to please others.”