How to Date Safely: Advice on Financial Safety in Dating and Relationships

Financial security is of vital importance when it comes to dating and relationships, especially in today’s day and age. If you are looking for advice on financial safety in this regard, this article is exactly what you need to read.

Money isn’t the root of all evil, not having it is.

After working in the dating industry for almost two decades, I have realized that almost all scammers are broke. Some women hustle men for money; some men hustle women for money. Don’t assume that all gold-diggers are women. Nowadays some men are also gold-diggers. Certain bum men hustle women if they suspect that these women are naïve. But getting money from women isn’t as easy as getting money from a guy – it usually takes an individual fluent in BS to pull it off on a larger scale. For example, this hustle oftentimes starts when the male gold-digger sells the lady on himself and all the big things he is doing, and then gradually and slowly, he asks for her help while promising to pay her back more than she gives him.

If you’d like to learn how to date safely, you may want to know the following true story first:

Owen was a player who paid his girlfriend Betty’s loan back for the first few times, but it was all game – he was just building faith so that he could get deeper into Betty’s pockets. Betty let Owen hold $200; Owen gave Betty $200 back and then took Betty out for dinner. Betty didn’t feel bad about helping her guy out financially as he was looking out for her, too (initially). Next time, Owen said, “By the way, can I hold $1,000?” At last, the player is ready for a big hit: Owen called in real trouble as he couldn’t find $5,000 to get him out of a bind. Because Betty knew that Owen would pay back his debt, Betty gave him $5,000. (Betty didn’t have that kind of money, so she borrowed money from her family members, asking for help that she would pay back in a few weeks.) Once Betty got Owen the money, Owen figured out this was possibly the highest amount he could hustle from Betty; thus, it was time to leave for the next lady.

As Owen was a sneaky fox, he wouldn’t disappear suddenly. To avoid repayment, Owen created a fake argument on purpose so as to break up with Betty and then Owen disappeared on her. Now Betty has lost her money and “love” at the same time. Meanwhile, her family members are talking about her behind her back in a really bad way. Yet Betty doesn’t know she got played because Owen was dating her for quite a while. However, the red flag was obvious in Week 1 – Betty chose to ignore it because of her loneliness and desperation. In other words, Owen saw her as means to an end, not a real girlfriend. Betty really needs to learn how to date safely!

How to date safely: The most common signs / red flags when it comes to money issues –

Common red flags that you can identify if you are a woman dating a male gold-digger (please take notes if you want to know how to date safely):

He says, “If you truly love me, you should help me financially.” (This player uses this line on naïve women who are lonely and desperate.)
He says, “I borrowed $100,000 from a friend last year to fix some previous issues. Now I have $50,000, so I need another $50,000 – can you help me? If you can’t help me, I will be fine, too. I could ask my sister for help, but my sister has done too much for me already. Now you are the closest person in my life, so I’m asking for your help.” (This player uses this line when he is in bed with you at night – he understands the power of emotional intimacy in the darkness. In reality, that “friend” doesn’t exist & he only has $50,000 credit card debt in total right now. He uses this fake story on inexperienced women who really, really want to get married now.)
He wants to look rich, even though he is broke. He tells you that his Louis Vuitton towel in the bathroom is genuinely from Louis Vuitton, even though you don’t even care about his freaking towel (or any towel).
He always talks about topics such as “angel investing”, but he is actually broke.
He acts as if he has many rich and powerful friends, but in reality, those rich and powerful people look down upon him or are hanging out with him for some other reasons.
He lies about small things, e.g. he gives you a small gift on Valentine’s Day to surprise you, and you ask him, “When did you buy this?” He says, “A few days ago.” In reality, you notice that the receipt in his drawer says he bought that gift on Valentine’s Day (one hour before he picked you up from your place).
He asks other people who may know your parents about what your parents do, thereby getting information regarding your family background in terms of finances.
When you randomly say, “Oh, I made $10,000 this month from various sources”, he suddenly becomes upset and says, “You should have told me about this earlier!” (You wonder what the hell has happened.)
When your friends give you gifts, he would keep these gifts for himself.
Before lending him money, he would say, “I will pay you back, including the interest. I can write a written proof about this loan.” After lending him money, you ask him to write a written proof about this loan, he does it unwillingly and even says, “Oh, is this the right format? I’ve never written anything like this before.”
Your dad says, “Since you’ve met this guy, your love life is all about ‘money’, ‘money’ and ‘money’. Isn’t that weird?!”

How to date safely: The most common red flags / signs that female gold-diggers display

When you are on a date with her, she wants to go to the shopping mall with you.
When you are on a dinner date with her, she orders the most expensive item in each category.
When you tell her that you will take her to a social event, she says she has nothing to wear & sends you a link to a website which sells expensive clothing and accessories.
When you give her a gift, she Googles this product in order to see its price online.
When you are hanging out with your wealthy friends, she is clearly more interested in your wealthy friends than in you.
She never offers to pay on a date.
When you suggest that you should have a date at home (cooking dinner and watching a movie), she is upset because she wants to go to a fancy restaurant and then attend a concert with you.
You are not sure whether you are dating a gold-digger or not, so now you are Googling “how to date safely”.
You think you’ve been hustled by her already, and now you want to ask a dating coach how to date safely.