The secret to success in online dating

Today you are in for a treat as I’m going to share with you my top three secrets to success in online dating in this article!

Secret 1: The secret to success is the word “secret”.

Helen Gurley Brown famously wrote, “How successful you could be is in direct proportion to how much you shut up about it.” That means if you don’t tell anyone about your plan, you can achieve success faster. Please let me explain.

If you are going to try online dating, please don’t tell anybody about it. Because you don’t tell anyone, they can’t judge you or laugh at you. No one needs to know what you are doing for your love life because that’s none of their business.

Therefore, the secret to success is secret. 😉

By the way, I’m a published author, but I didn’t tell anyone that I was writing a book until my book was already published. Why? Well, that’s because if I never finished writing a book, other people wouldn’t laugh at me or judge me – they didn’t even know I was writing a book anyway. As a result, I could relax and do whatever I needed to do in order to make great things happen.

When I had a day job, I started my own business on the side without telling anyone. Why didn’t I tell anyone? Clearly, that’s because if I had told others what I was doing at that time, they would have wanted to know my progress which was none of their business anyway. Because I was low-profile and quiet, I was able to focus on my side hustle after work pretty well. Within a few years, my own business was generating more revenue than the salary from my day job. That was exactly when I quit my day job & then started to work on my own freelance writing business full-time. 😊

Secret 2: Identify yourself as a dater.

Many years ago, I wanted to learn how to dance because the artistic expression has always been important to me. When I started my dance lessons, my teacher was wondering why I wasn’t confident enough, so I said, “I’m not a dancer.”

“This is the first thing that you must stop saying to yourself if you are keen to be a good dancer,” said my teacher, “You have to start saying, ‘I’m a dancer’ and identify with this. It doesn’t really matter whether you are a professional dancer or not; you simply can’t be what you don’t identify within the first place.”

Identity is everything.

Thus, if you are keen to try online dating, please identify yourself as a dater from now on. This is something you choose as your identity now. Once you have this identity, you will become more romantic, open-minded, creative, and spontaneous. All of these qualities will give you better results in your love life.

Secret 3: What is the progress that you must make today?

Life is short.

I witnessed my grandparents’ passing more than two decades ago and I realized that life is short. When I was young, I already knew that I didn’t want to live like my grandparents because they didn’t go to very good schools – they had limited resources in life as a result. I wanted to be wise, well-educated, and enlightened. Hence, I worked very hard to go to university and changed my life forever.

Two years ago, my mother had an operation. Fortunately, it was only the very early stage of cancer, so she is okay now. Today she sent me some of her photos which were taken this afternoon, I noticed that she looks very old now. Due to external factors, I haven’t seen my parents in person for twelve years, although I chat with them online every day.

After seeing my mother’s photos today, I have suddenly learned a few things:

I must cherish every single day in my life, so I have to give up things like anxiety. If I don’t allow anxiety to control my life, I become more relaxed and more productive. The results are twofold.

This year I will overcome all obstacles & meet my parents soon and live with them again. I’ll give them the medical care that they need and deserve. I’ll look after them and give them unconditional love.

What’s more, each day I have to make some kind of progress to make life better. Baby steps are important steps. For instance, today I stopped checking (I had some OCD), so this is a personal improvement already.

This concept can be applied to online dating as well. If you would like to succeed in online dating, you can make some progress every day, e.g., initiate more conversations with women on the dating website, work on your communication skills, improve your grooming as well as fashion, and so forth.