“Your eyes are beautiful.” You say this to a Slavic lady that you’ve just met.

“Do you say that to every woman?” She suddenly asks you this question.

Yes. It’s a test! She puts you in a new frame to see whether you can maintain your inner stillness or not.

  • Now we are going to show you how to pass the tests!

Step 1 is to not fail the test, i.e., not getting emotionally reactive, defensive or even showing a negative response. So, you might say, “I don’t have a response for that. Why can’t we just be normal?” (The implied meaning: “I do not care that you just tested me as I’m very comfortable with myself. Now you are a bit weird.”)

Step 2 is to use one of the following methods:

  1. I) Misinterpret: Misinterpreting the negative frame that a woman puts you in, and flip it on its head so that it puts her into the frame of making an advance.

For instance, she says, “You are wearing a very strange T-shirt.” You say, “Hey. Don’t check out my body. My eyes are right here.”

You misinterpret the test as her checking out your body, so you are changing the connotation of what she said.

In this moment, she is in a unique situation as she can either go along with the brand-new frame that you have set (she checking out your body) or she could explain herself logically and try correcting you – if she starts to explain herself, it means she is being the reactive and try-hard one in the dynamics.

  1. II) Agree and exaggerate: You will take whatever the frame of the test is and then point out the absurdity of it via exaggeration.
    • A frame is the assumption underlying a conversation which dictates the meaning of the interaction.For example, if you approach a Slavic woman and she thinks you are just another beta guy who is trying to pick her up, this frame puts you at a much lower value than her.By contrast, you may have the frame that you are a high-value guy giving a perfect opportunity to this very lucky lady. This frame puts you in a position of much higher value than her.

      With two conflicting frames, it’s about deciding which frame will win during the test – When you agree and exaggerate the negative frame a woman puts you in, you point out to her how absurd she is for even having that frame! For example, a woman says, “You say that to every woman, right?” You say, “Yeah. I’ve said it to every woman. In fact, I’ve said it 1,001 times today alone, and it was strange when I said it to my grandma and my aunt though. Perhaps I should totally stop doing that?!” In this way, you are pointing out how weird it is of her to ask such a question when you have been clever and witty while showing that you don’t even care because you are a clever and witty guy with or without her!

      Again, tests are your friend because they are a sign that you’ve done something right. Just pass them with flying colors. You are welcome.

       

      “When a Slavic woman gives you a test, just pass it with confidence.”